Exit 37 Route 80 Rockaway Jesus

A few years back, Rockaway NJ was the epicenter of one of the biggest Christian conflicts this state has ever experienced when the decision was made relocating the very urban Christ Church from Montclair to rustic, sedated, Rockaway. I’m assuming since it hasn’t been much in the paper much lately, that it has calmed down and a recent trek to the local Christian bookstore gave no indication that the controversy was still a brewing.

Once inside the store, I was immediately drawn to the plethora of Kneeling Santa statues and figurines. Now I realize that Christians have been trying to reconcile the whole Santa-in-Christmas thing but I did find Santa kneeling at our Savior’s cattle troth a bit odd, if not creepy.

A soft-spoken Sunday schoolish-looking sales person approached me. "Do you know the story of Santa and baby Jesus?" she asked. At first I thought she was kidding, but she looked way too sincere. I thought for a moment that perhaps she held the secret why in my hometown, Santa is right there at the manger (along with Sponge Bob and a few of Snow White’s Dwarfs).

So right there in the middle of the Family Christian Bookstore I heard the most amazing story in which I’ll give you the very abridged version:

Santa finds a young boy asleep in some hay/Santa wakes the young boy up/young boy wants to see how Santa makes the toys/Santa slips on ice/ breaks his leg/there’s a lost reindeer/young boy moves in with Santa/young boy makes Santa a pair of crutches/boy instructs the elves to modify the sleigh to be more like a chaise lounge/Santa delivers presents with the boy on Christmas eve/Santa finishes his rounds but boy insists he has one more stop/boy shows Santa where he was born/Santa hobbles to a stable filed with animals, wise men, Mary and Joseph/Santa kneels to worship the baby.

And I thought the story of Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer was strange. She looked me in the eye and said, "Of course this is not historically correct."
　
But alais,
Phil 2:10 …at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth.

Exit 26 Route 80 Long Valley Jesus

Long Valley was known since colonial times as German Valley, but then along came WWI and the townsfolk just had to separate themselves from anything Germanic. The most famous place in the valley is still the German, I mean, Long Valley Pub & Brewery whose website proudly proclaims, "We are kid friendly!"

I can hear those parents now, Hey kids, drink up, it’s happy hour. And those kids, We never want Chuck E. Cheese again! Good thing Jesus's first miracle occured during a wedding, not a birthday party.

Nestled on a hilltop overlooking the valley is St. Luke’s Parish and the parish loves the local children and they want their kids to know Jesus loves them too. Sculputre Tom White created a garden of bronze just outside the parish’s front door. You can find his story here:

http://www.tomwhitestudio.com/tom-white-christian-bronze-sculptor-artist.html

He ends his website with:

John 12:32 "And I, if I be lifted up from the earth, will draw all men unto me." His bronze Jesus certainly appears to be coming straight out of the earth with arms stretched wide.

Luke 18:
People were also bringing babies to Jesus to have him touch them. When the disciples saw this, they rebuked them.

But Jesus called the children to him and said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these."

　

Exit 2 NJTP Elmer Jesus

Last night I watched the horror flick, Wrong Turn. It’s your typical adolescent-lost-in-the-woods-they-all-die (except for one) B movie. Today I took that wrong turn and ended up in Elmer. I came across this road sign and knew I was in trouble.

Now I’ve lived in this beloved state for almost half a century and I’ve never heard of any place called, Elmer. I did spot a diner, so I knew I was still in Jersey. [Not that I was going to stop in for a cup of Joe].

If you look up the term, "Jersey Redneck" in the Urban Dictionary, this is what you’ll find:

Jersey rednecks typically dwell in backwoods areas within Philadelphian suburbs, where there is still plenty of rural land for the blue-collar folk. Almost every Jersey redneck owns a Chevy pickup truck, which they park in their "driveway", which is not really a driveway but an area of their lawn in which grass isn't growing. Their front yards are home to various appliances and vehicles that no longer function, somehow finding their way there. The origins of their slow southern accent is mysterious, though speculation reveals that it is probably from listening to too much Lynyrd Skynyrd. No one thought hicks lived so far north until the Jersey redneck was discovered.

The Urban Dictionary ends with these ominous words, "There are more Jersey Rednecks than you once believed!" I’m thinking, "Help me Jesus."

Then to my surprise, there he was, well, sort of. It wasn’t a Chevy pickup but it had Redneck written all over it. But at least the vehicle owners sure loved Jesus – even if they had a strange way of showing it.

Isaiah 41:10 So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/thejerseytomato/ Elmer Diner Photo Credit

Exit 136 GSP Linden Jesus

With its many refining facilities supplying over 230,000 barrels of petroleum-based products, you smell Linden, long before you get there. Perhaps someone at the local government was sniffing much too much of the petrol at Christmas.

To the city’s credit, there is a Nativity scene built on the front lawn of City Hall. The wise men at the city government decided that the manger would lay empty without the Christ child until December 25th when the baby would miraculously appear.

Only problem was that December 25th came and went without Jesus in the manger. The other Wisemen, Mary & Joseph along with a few sheep and cows starred at an empty troth.

But then the Christmas miracle happened, albeit a day late. Baby Jesus, wearing a blue-painted blanket was spotted in the crib next to the Hanukkah menorah. The mayor explained, "It was an embarrassing oversight." Residents complained that the city has no problem remembering when tax bills are due but can’t seem to remember when Christ was born.

II Peter: So I will always remind you of these things, even though you know them and are firmly established in the truth you now have. I think it is right to refresh your memory as long as I live in the tent of this body, because I know that I will soon put it aside, as our Lord Jesus Christ has made clear to me. And I will make every effort to see that after my departure you will always be able to remember these things.

Exit 11 GSP Sayreville Missing Jesuses

By Mary Jo Patterson
Religion News Service

Sayreville, N.J. - Detectives investigating the theft of a baby Jesus statue
from an outdoor Nativity scene at a Sayreville church followed a trail on Monday (Jan. 2, 2008) that led them to the missing statue -- and 26 other baby Jesus figurines.

Police said they assumed all 27 statues had been stolen, although they did
not know from where.

Police spread the figurines out on a counter at police headquarters to take
inventory. All lay, in swaddling clothes, on their backs.

"It looks like a nursery here," said police spokesman Ken Kelly.

The figurines, most of them plastic, were found stashed "in plain view" in a
car parked outside the home of Christopher Olson, 18, of Old Bridge,
N.J.,police said.

The discovery brought relief to the parishioners of St. Stanislaus Church,
who had taken the theft of their statue very hard, according to the Rev. Ken
Murphy, their pastor.

The theft, as well as the theft of a smaller baby Jesus from the church's
school and the toppling of a 15-foot crucifix in the church's cemetery, took
place late last week (Dec. 30 or 31).

By late Monday, word of the baby Jesus stash had begun to circulate in Old
Bridge.

Lou Saverese, a resident of the street where the car was found, said a
mystery had been solved. About three weeks before Christmas, he said, the
baby Jesus in his Nativity scene disappeared.

"My wife thought the wind might have taken it away, but then we noticed
other people on the block were also missing their baby Jesus," he said.
Then, in a park down the road, he saw two more plastic Jesus figures hanging
from a telephone pole. Police cut them down.

Rev. Murphy said it best: "As I told people ..., the most important thing is, we celebrated the birthof Jesus," he said. "Jesus is in many different places. If they saw the display and saw he wasn't there, they would be reminded that he is in them."

John 15:4" Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself unless it abides in the vine, so neither can you unless you abide in Me.

Exit 13A NJ Turnpike - Elizabeth Jesus

During the Revolution, the Brits occupying Manhattan and Staten Island realized that Elizabeth was not named after their past queen and attacked the city with due diligence.

Way back in the 1800’s the city was home to not one, but two Electric Car manufacturing plants. Go figure. It is currently home to The Hope Center which is the launching pad for the New York City Relief buses providing bread and soup in the name of Jesus to places in the city few dare to travel.

Saturday, I was offered a rare opportunity to work a little OT. Living in North Jersey, I could surely use the cash. I was also offered the opportunity to feed the homeless in the South Bronx with New York City Relief. Feed the poor, or make some cash? There really wasn’t a choice. My colleagues at work thought I was nuts.

The weather was brutal, wet and windy. Driving down the NJ Turnpike to the Hope Center, I thought of Micah 6:8 and then tried to find an "out clause" for wind and rain – to no avail.

I felt pretty darn sure no one would stand in a nor’easter for a cup of soup. Stupid me.

Standing in the windblown rain outside that soup truck on a vacant lot on 148th Street, I witnessed it. People came, lots of them, individuals at first, then whole families and extended families. They came for a slice of bread, a cup of soup and a little bit of Jesus. For a fleeting moment, I couldn’t comprehend that this slice of NYC is America for many, many people.

During the course of the day I was speaking with an ex-gang leader recently released from jail. He explained how he once ruled this part of the South Bronx dictating who got mugged, robbed or knifed. He told me his buddies call him Lucifer, the Devil, Satan and Evil and that those names now brought him down.

I remembered a video at Liquid Church where the screen showed individuals who were downtrodden and negative descriptions of them were flashed on the screen only to have their faces appear again with words of how God sees them – loved. I told him to cast out those names and replace with how God sees him Worthy, Loved, God’s special child. It was a bit remarkable but then he began focusing on some of the positive things he’s done for others and what others have done for him.

I'll tell you what it means to worship the Lord. Remove the chains of the prisoners who are chained unjustly. Free those who are abused! Share your food with everyone who is hungry; share your home with the poor and homeless. Give clothes to those in need; don't turn away your relatives. Isaiah 58

Exit 43A-B Route 80 - Morristown Jesus

Morristown is known as the "Cradle of the Revolutionary War." In 1773 George Washington slept here. On this particular Saturday it was known for something else: water.

The Green in the town center was transformed into a 2008 version of Water World, but without Kevin Costner. Sponsored by Liquid, this local Morristown church is having global influence by raising awareness for clean water in Sub-Saharan Africa.

Waterwalk: For each local resident who carried canisters of water down the waterwalk, Liquid provided access to clean water for a child for the next 20 years.

Waterslide: Not just for kids, this slide told a story of well, water waste.

Water bottles: To remind us that unsafe water and lack of basic sanitation cause 80% of all sickness and disease, and kill more people every year than all forms of violence, including war. Of the 42,000 deaths that occur every week from unsafe water and a lack of basic sanitation, 90% are children under 5 years old.

Liquid’s tag line, "Living water for a thirsty world," is derived from Jesus’ words: "If anyone is thirsty, let him come to me and drink. Whoever believes in me, as the Scripture has said, streams of living water will flow from within him."

There were lots of believers, streams of living water and streams of just plain water as the skies opened and the water flowed.

Matthew 10: And if anyone gives even a cup of cold water to one of these little ones because he is my disciple, I tell you the truth, he will certainly not lose his reward."

Exit 155P GS Parkway - Paterson Jesus

The leaders of Paterson originally hired Pierre L'Enfant to design the city. City officials rejected his plans so L’Enfant took those blueprints to Washington, DC. The rest is history.

Entering Paterson on Grand St, you are greeted by Jesus. "Vengan a mi los que van cansados, pesadas cargas, y yo los aliviare," the billboard reads. It is reassuring that Jesus is here in Paterson, along with the gangs. The Ruler of all Nature is here amidst the rulers of the streets.

Drive a bit further into the city and you will find the intersection of "Straight & Narrow," literally. At this intersection is Jesus, in infant form. This small inner city intersection may not appear to have any significance to the outsider but this is where you will find, "Straight & Narrow, Inc." S&N, founded in 1954, is the oldest community-based organization of its kind in the United States.

This place serves 6,000 people per year providing assistance for substance abusers, people with HIV/AIDS, those requiring intervention for driving while intoxicated, and children in need of day care. Baby Jesus is watching over all 6,000.

Matthew 7: "Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it."